Checkers versus Fortnite: strategy against “gaming”

Kids nowadays get easily hooked with on-line gaming that seemingly never ends. Games like Fortnite are free “strategy” games that are supposed to be played by 12-year-olds or older, but parents around the globe are complaining that even 8-year-olds are showing addictive tendencies.  There are good articles with recommendations (see here) and this game does not display blood but we need to be on alert and continue discussion with our child or teen.

Cognitive psychology studies prove that the brain increases its “energy” to the point that the child behaves aggressively and even has trouble falling asleep. It’s like “on-line cocaine”, a plague of our modern times. Parents are tired, their digital literacy (one of the health literacies) may not include understanding how problems about addiction start, mainly due to ongoing immediate gratification.

Many games have beautiful graphics, I must admit, and kids learn the English language better as they interact with their “friends” locally and globally.  Fortnite added character dancing so players can mimic (this is a good thing) for exercise.  But the negative aspects of firearms and shooting (the sound alone creates stress on the brain), screen time and staying up late at night affects health negatively . There are countless studies now that contribute to growing evidence that we need to do something about it, and this is not unlike the growing obesity problem.

If you don’t teach your kid to control it early you can literally lose your child to the virtual world.  Parents and other caretakers need to get control back in strategic ways and keep it fun so it’s sustainable.

So after trying to find a zillion ways to get my pre-teen off this potential addiction — including sports, movies, art, social events — I realized the biggest issue is the lack of patience. Music and bedtime stories may work but all this changes as “tweens” move to teens.

The other day my hairdresser told me about her client a single mother who has “lost” her 15-year-old to the virtual world of gaming and of course Fortnite and other online games make millions at the expense of our children’s health — mental, physical, and even spiritual. Our kids would rather stay in, not eat or drink, and they are constantly adrenaline ridden (and learning swear words) which in itself is dangerous to their body’s organs and our social interactions. Anger management for teens anyone?

So I took the step …despite the odds of losing interest to the fast-paced game I challenged my kid to a game of checkers. Yep that 12th century game that we all played as kids did it, and we even involved grandma! So this was a bit frustrating to relearn but it involves slowing down and thinking of the next move. And it involved inter-generational fun.

Be creative and rethink how you can re-teach others what they need to remember …simple strategy and patience, we all need that.

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Waiting time, me first!?

Yesterday I was waiting in line at the bank as they had changed their system in the last five months so those in the que needed to have numbered tickets. Summer is also a time with a lot of ex-pats and visitors to countries who may have no idea of the way things are done or changes and indeed a new system could create several communication issues…

I happened to ask a question and one of the few employees (think cut-backs and vacation time so it was the so-called “skeleton crew”) and she had directed me to an odd looking stand with a digital button to receive a number for the que. There were primarily older people over 70 years, one whom I’ll call “Gus” and one mid-lifer (45-50 years) who sat down after me, started listening to music singing to himself whom I’ll call “Dick”.  What came to unfold was another case of personality traits up against digital – access literacy.

Gus was talking to me about the cuts in his social security and his disappointment with the current leadership and how he doesn’t see for the last three years any improvements. In fact, on a functional societal level it’s been the worst ever and the damage has been done for years to come despite these articles about Greece getting out of debt (well financially banks have gained and all Greek tax payers have been squeezed like no one can imagine since WWII!) a good one by Ms. Stamouli for the Wall Street Journal (link WSJ). Gus it turns out had not gotten a number for the que, so when the number changed Dick sprang up and in essence cut, even though he clearly saw the people waiting before him.

Gus: “Sir, sorry but it’s my turn in line” (Dick first ignored him, looking at the bank teller).

Dick: “Well this is my number”

This is where I had enough and said to Dick “please don’t tell me you didn’t see the people waiting here in front of you AND you see it’s obvious the man is older and likely didn’t know he had to get a ticket?” (no response just looking at us and the teller).

Bank que number

Waiting time 10 minutes on average

At this point, the teller was going to allow the older man to go in front, but Dick (true to his name) didn’t budge, so Gus just said “it’s ok…it’s obvious to me this man doesn’t have courtesy”. I got up gave Gus my ticket and got another one glaring at Dick. You guessed it, we waited until Dick was done, as I said to Gus loudly for Dick and others to hear “You see if you’re dealing the ‘me-first’ people there is no point in talking sense to them…” Gus agreed as did a woman next to me and of course we continued pleasantly to talk about a group, maybe even a newer generation of people who are oblivious to their surroundings most of the time including to those with special needs or elders, pregnant women, etc. there is such a need of mindfulness training!

Personality traits like narcissism, digital literacy, corporate and human communication….hmm….don’t even get me started about the tailgating and “me first” attitude on the roads!